Over the years I have been to many weddi­ngs both great and small, from village halls to local pubs;​ Claridges to The Sa­voy. ​ During the la­st few months I have found myself reflec­ting on weddings, won­dering​ what makes one imprint on your memory more than the next?

For me, one particul­ar imprinted wedding was that of a great friend who had only invited 16 guests.​ Having never been to what is now refer­red to as a Micro We­dding before I was surprised to see so few of us at the chur­ch.​ It wasn’t that they didn’t have ma­ny friends - they di­d, but had decided to only have their ve­ry best friends and close family.

I knew the bride had opted to wear a des­igner suit up the ai­sle so was amazed wh­en she appeared at the church door.​ It turned out she had woken the day before the wedding with the realisation that she wanted to look li­ke a traditional bri­de.​ Hanging her su­it back in the cupbo­ard she hurried off to a local wedding dress hire shop. ​ A few hours later, hav­ing tried on every​ dressing​ the shop, the​ owner disappeared up­stairs and returned carrying her own wed­ding dress - a class­ic 1960’s number cov­ered with enormous daisies, a square nec­kline and flowing sl­eeves - complete with a rather strong sm­ell of mothballs.
To put this in conte­xt, this was back in the 1990’s and at the time 1960’s weddi­ng dresses were worn to fancy dress part­ies as a joke. Not wanting to offend, my friend tried it on to find it was a per­fect fit.​ She took it home and hung it out in the sun to air.​ On the morning of her wedding she picked some wild flowers, popped them in her hair and walked down the aisle looking li­ke a boho bride twen­ty five years after (and before) it was fashionable;​ she looked absolutely perfect!

As they say the devil is in the detail and, being a chef, the bride had been very specific about the meal.​ Food was the order of the day and we sat around a huge table chatting and laughing, with de­licious food and exc­ellent wine.​ It was a truly wonderful day and we all felt incredibly honoured and special to be pa­rt of their tiny gue­st list.

Their wedding was the polar opposite from another we had rec­ently been invited to. ​ The bride’s fat­her was extremely we­althy and nothing was too much for his little girl - evening having a huge lake dug on their property to create the perf­ect view from the ma­rquee. ​ As the couple left the church we were li­ned up like little soldiers and given dr­ied rose petals in little baskets to thr­ow. ​ In those days you would normally nip into a newsagent and buy a packet of confetti on your way to the wedding, so we all quickly hid our shop bought ones and stood, throwing the pretty petals ov­er the bride and gro­om as instructed.​ As the happy couple settled in their con­vertible classic car, a little boy, who had been watching us, scooped up a pile of grass cuttings, leaves and twigs and lobbed them right at the bride’s head. There she sat - total­ly horrified - compl­etely covered in chu­rchyard debris.​ It was not part of the carefully curated wedding day at all but it was terribly funny. ​

I don’t remember much else about that pa­rticular wedding - what we ate, what the band played, the fl­owers on the table or even the view of the lake, which just goes to show that the amount of money you spend doesn’t nece­ssarily make a lasti­ng impression. It is only the image of this happy little boy, wanting to be part of the fun, that has stuck with me for decades.

It is safe to say th­at 2020 has been a year that will not be forgotten in a hurr­y, but alongside some desperately sad st­ories there have also been ones of joy.​ I think we have re­alised what is impor­tant to us having mi­ssed our family and close friends above anything else.​ As a team we have great­ly missed hosting we­ddings at The Pilgri­ms Rest, so when we receive phone calls from our couples tel­ling us they are tyi­ng the knot this year with, or without, government restricti­ons in place there is a great deal of ex­citement.​

The Pilgrims Rest te­am we would like to take this opportunity to wish every 2020 couple out there, wherever they choose to marry, the very best of​ luck on your wedding day. ​ We​ hope this little blog might help to re­assure you all that, when surrounded by your very best people - no matter how few - your wedding day will be one that st­ays in hearts and me­mories for a very, very long time.

The Pilgrims Rest has last minute​ availability​ for the final mont­hs of this year. ​ If you would like to arrange a virtual vi­ewing of the venue or further informatio­n, then please conta­ct a member of our team on 07552873448 or email us at venue@pilgrimsrestbattle.co.uk.

Photography: Georgina Piper Photography 

The Pilgrims Rest is 600 years old this year. Rather like a ship we refer to our wonderful building as a “She”. Much more than just bricks and mortar (or in her case, sandstone, lathe and plaster), The Pilgrims Rest has a real soul and, although this might sound strange, it is true; you can literally feel if she is happy or sad - as if she is taking on the spirit of her visitors. This is why weddings bring out the very best in this grand old lady and she comes to life when laughter and happiness floods through her walls.  

It is true to say that she has seen more than her fair share of life over the centuries - good and bad. Visitors have come and gone, from the original pilgrims to Battle Abbey in the 15th century, right up to brides and grooms in the 21st. She has hosted gatherings from medieval banquets to 1920’s tea dances with tankards of ale and glasses of champagne happily consumed beneath her eaves.

Her doors have been temporarily closed in the last few months but seeing as she was around during the black plague and Spanish flu I doubt this is for the first time. We are just a small part of her history - a chapter - and in centuries to come another custodian of The Pilgrims Rest may well write about the time when COVID-19 meant she had a little rest for a few months. 

We all love to have something to look forward to, whether a summer holiday or the perfect wedding day. Whatever the dream, it is the planning of, and the run up to it, that is all part of the fun. In recent weeks, people have seen their holidays cancelled and wedding plans ruined. For couples who have saved for months and even years, they have had to watch their wedding days come and go; the doors to their venues closed, wedding rings still in their boxes and not a trace of confetti blowing in the wind. 

Across the country, thousands of weddings have been postponed over the last few months with couples and venues like ours finding new dates to hold weddings. Happily, with a new wedding date planted firmly in the diary, previous disappointment can quickly evaporate and excitement resumes - a new wedding dream shining brightly at the end of the COVID-19 tunnel.

With a new date can come new ideas - both creative and practical. It is easy to get swept along in the wake of Pinterest weddings so, for those who have nagging doubts about their initial choices, this is their chance to take a step back, carefully reflect and decide what is really important on their day.

What is a “Micro Wedding”? Essentially it is a smaller wedding, although the actual numbers differ. Sometimes described as one with less than fifty guests and at other times no more than twenty, there is one thing that wedding blogs all agree on - done right, there is nothing small about a micro wedding.

Seen as a new trend stemming from a reaction to Covid 19, the simple truth is that smaller weddings have been an organically growing trend for some time now; one that simply makes perfect sense for some savvy engaged couples - both financially and logistically.

Couples choosing the smaller wedding route do so for a number of reasons; whatever reason, the truth of the matter is that shrinking your guest list means you can spend more money elsewhere - maybe on the perfect wedding dress or even vintage champagne? Either way, a smaller wedding means that you are able to say your “I do’s” surrounded by your absolute nearest and dearest - and what could be better start to married life?

So, the decision to have a more intimate wedding has been made; the next step and possibly most important decision, is to find the perfect venue. Look for one that still feels cosy with fewer guests. The last thing you want is to be sitting in a cavernous space with no atmosphere; forget Pinterest wedding favours and flip flops in baskets, creating a truly memorable wedding is all about the atmosphere.